{ thankful }

 Last night I took dinner in to a dear friend who is just beginning the fight for her life against breast cancer and who had just returned home after a double mastectomy.

It surely makes all of the 'Black Friday'

hype seem downright silly.

I think tomorrow I will hug my grandchildren a little longer, call my dear dad,

kiss my sweet husband, express thanks for my four children and their great spouses and let someone else get the deal of the season.

I already have the gold.

{34 years . . . and counting}

Thirty four years ago this July I told Mr. W. 
that even if we lived in a tent, 
I would marry him.
I was completely smitten with this man (still am)!

Well . . . 34 years later (and likening the scriptures
to myself)

1 Nephi 2:15

And my father (I) dwelt in a tent.

I spent my 34th anniversary in a tent!

Loves of my life - my dad & Mr. W.

Instead of the traditional opal gift,

I received a new air mattress, perfectly cooked s'mores,
the lullabies of pine trees, the rush of a clear mountain stream, listening to ghost stories around the campfire,

Fun is mandatory!

marveling at the mountains majesties and sipping hot chocolate in the early morning hours as I directed
lost joggers (who stared in shock at my 'bedhead' hairdo - 
hey, it was early and I was sleeping on the ground in a tent) towards the Timp trailhead.

Jason & Mr. W. - July 2011

Best of all, I'm still head over heels in love with the
same man that I promised to follow in thick or in thin,
in mansion or tent, to the ends of the world.

And that (as Mastercard would say), is priceless!

{sisters}

Kathy, Nancy & Carolyn - 1957

It's hard to be responsible,

adult and sensible all the time.

How good it is to have a sister

whose heart is as young as your own. 

- Pam Brown -

Nancy, Carolyn, Dad & Kathy

Happy 60th Birthday, Carolyn!

learning my times tables

A little over 18 years ago on February 19th I was in the recovery room after delivering my third baby, Jason.  I had a (barely) three year old and a thirteen month old (January 19th) waiting for me at home.  I was overwhelmed by the task ahead of me but grateful for the safe delivery of this new baby boy.  As I laid there, I sensed the presence of another child destined for our family.  Obviously, fertility was not an issue for me and I assumed that in a couple of years (once I got my feet back under me and my brood a little older), we would welcome that child in to our family.


But God had other plans for me.

I recognize now that God had me feel that child at that moment so that I would have the courage to endure what was ahead of me.  I think that had I felt that at any other time I would have written it off as being 'baby hungry' but, because it came at a time when I was definitely not planning my next pregnancy, I knew it was a quiet prompting that I would need to reference back to in the years ahead.


During the next eleven years and as a result of an infertility work-up, I was diagnosed with severe endometriosis.  I went through laparoscopic surgery, Lupron hormone injection therapy, miscarriages, D&Cs, tears, heartbreak, grief, pleading with God, frustration with women who were carrying unwanted pregnancies and long stretches of not being able to conceive or conceiving only to lose the pregnancy at two months.

One night, after yet another ultrasound showed no heartbeat, I sat in my rust velvet swivel rocker and rocked and cried and cried some more as I grieved the end of a pregnancy and prepared my heart and mind for yet another D&C.  I had come to know all too well the look on the ultrasound techs' faces when they are unable to find a heartbeat.  Each time they would look and look and look, then place the call to the radiologist to come to the ultrasound room to confirm their findings and then the news that this pregnancy, with all of it's hopes and dreams, is over.  I even had one radiologist look at me and say, "Don't go buy maternity clothes.  You won't need them."


But still I clung to that feeling in the recovery room and I pressed on.

Ten years later, I was 35, my endrometriosis was severe and I had an appointment with my doctor to schedule a hysterectomy.  I felt like God knew my heart and I had tried.  Two days before my appointment, I found out I was pregnant.  With guarded optimism, I went to my appointment and prayed for the best.  Because of my age and medical history, I was considered a high risk pregnancy but I was praying that this pregnancy would be blessed and that I could carry this baby to full term.


On February 19th, exactly eleven years after that day in the recovery room (and two weeks before my due date), I delivered a healthy baby girl with big blue eyes and curly hair.


God had kept His promise to me but it was in God's time, not mine.  And in doing so, I learned that God keeps His promises, He is aware of me, He knows me by name and He knows the righteous desires of my heart.  He was always there - through heartache and triumph.  But in the process, He allowed me to grieve and grow, to trust and love, to wait and listen and to always show faith.

My baby girl is know grown up and graduating from high school on Thursday.  She is a daily reminder to me of God's miracles and promises.  During a very hard time in my life, she was a reminder that God's time table is not always mine but He is there - always.


I thought I had learned all of my times tables in 3rd grade with Mrs. Shoell but I have found that I had one more to learn from God and, in learning that one, I have been blessed.

Who is Jim Dandy?

Fancy Nancy's dad . . . of course!

{love}

Love one another

and

you will be happy,

it is as simple

and as difficult

as that.

- Michael Leunig -

Jensen & Brad - March 2011

A Little Green & Gold

* A moment of silence for all red/green color blind people in the world.  Let's just say that St. Patrick's Day was a very rough holiday for Mr. W. growing up.  He could never quite be sure he had green on - it all looks brown to him. *

A Senior Moment

Vanessa at Log Haven

Watching your child develop is like watching a beautiful rose slowly unfold one petal at a time.  The divine within is immediately apparent but their individual personalities manifest themselves moment by moment.  It is humbling to see each of your children become the person they were meant to be.

Elizabeth's rose

Tonight we attended Timpview's Choir Concert.  In an act of complete bravery, Vanessa volunteered to accompany the Mixed Choir.  She played beautifully in front of a packed auditorium made up of peers and families.  I realized at the end of her piece that I had not taken a breath throughout her performance.

After the concert

During my brief piano lesson experience, I quit before every recital.  

I still become overwhelmed and shaky whenever I try to play in public.  

I am so impressed with Vanessa's courage to try (and accomplish) something outside of her comfort zone.  I present 'Cantate Domino' sung by the Timpview Mixed Chorus accompanied by Vanessa.

My Dad's Christmas Message

The Bezzant Christmas Party - December 13, 2010

* A note to my family - This message is tender and personal.

We are blessed to still have Dad for this Christmas season -

a season that Mom loved so dearly.

Facebook did not seem the appropriate place

for such a personal video and the file was too big

to send via email but I wanted to share this

with our whole family, particularly those

who couldn't attend the family party.

We are blessed to 'have it all' -

love, family and the restored gospel!

Have a very 'Grandma Mary' Christmas -

hopes it's fancy! *

(The video was shot with my little point and shoot camera and so, while the message is great, the image quality not so much.  I accidently paused the recording in the middle but immediately started recording again and so nothing was lost - I like to think of it as a bit of an intermission.)

A Night At The Museum

the lobby

this guy greeted us right outside our motel room!

Another one for the Bucket List. I had never considered the possibility of sleeping over at the Bean Museum.  It just happened to be my there were no over motels with vacancies at 11 p.m. in Cody, Wyoming with my dad was well past his bedtime - who knew that tourist season for Yellowstone Park goes through the end of October lucky day (night).

We not only got a room but an opportunity to stay in a hunter's/taxidermist's dream motel.  Unfortunately for us, the motel we stopped at before this one had no vacancies (our fifth try).  Their lobby was filled with just about every kind of African animal (full sized rhino, male lion, gazelle, etc.)  I did not see a giraffe and elephant but then I was in a bit of a hurry.  I wish I had my camera for that one.

The pictures hardly do this place justice.

for Ryan

Did I mention that, due to the lack of available motel rooms, Mr. W. and I shared a room with my dad and Bonnie.  I told Dad that we had come full circle - it was like when I was little and shared a motel room with my dad and mom (and six siblings).

Breakfast is served!

Years ago our family stayed in a motel right on the highway in Evanston, Wyoming.  As kids, we were so excited to find that, for just a quarter, the bed would vibrate.  How great is that! (we thought).  A motel room with beds to entertain children.  All seven of us piled on the bed, put in a quarter and went for a ride on the bed.  It's amazing that we didn't break the bed.  We were so innocent . . . I realized a few years ago that the bed wasn't intended for children.  Oh well, we got our money's worth - 25 cents divided by 7 children - definitely cheaper than Disneyland!

Riding In A Rickshaw

Another item for my Bucket List.

Ride in a rickshaw!

Our driver

Mr. W, Bonnie and I went to 

the Rockies/Diamondback baseball game.  

You could hitch a ride on a bicycle rickshaw 

from the parking lot to the stadium 

(and back if you wanted to) for a small fee.  

Considering that I am still limping along with a sore foot, 

we went for it.

Bonnie & the rickshaw - loved the lights

Let's just say that our driver earned his money!  

Three for the price of one.

Worth every dollar!

Senior Summit

I made 'Senior Summit'

(it reminds me of life's highs & lows)

Can you see Vanessa's
toes & fingers peeking out?

in honor of

Vanessa's senior year.
(did you notice the THS colors?)